Philosophy in the Bedroom - Marquis De Sade - ebook

Philosophy in the Bedroom ebook

Marquis de Sade



Philosophy in the Bedroom Marquis De Sade - Philosophy in the Bedroom is a 1795 book by the Marquis De Sade written in the form of a dramatic dialogue. Though initially considered a work of pornography, the book has come to be considered a socio-political drama. Set in a bedroom, the seven dialogues concern Eugenie, a virgin, who has been sent to the house of Madame de Saint-Ange by her father, to be instructed in the ways of the libertine. Along with Le Chevalier de Mirval, (Madame de Saint-Ange's 20-year-old brother), and Dolmancé, a 36-year-old atheist and bisexual, they all teach her their ways. When her mother shows up, she is punished for bringing her daughter up with 'false virtues'.

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Marquis De Sade
Philosophy in the Bedroom


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To Libertines

Voluptuaries of all ages, of every sex, it is to you only that I offer this work; nourish yourselves upon its principles: they favor your passions, and these passions, whereof coldly insipid moralists put you in fear, are naught but the means Nature employs to bring man to the ends she prescribes to him; hearken only to these delicious Promptings, for no voice save that of the passions can conduct you to happiness. Lewd women, let the voluptuous Saint-Ange be your model; after her example, be heedless of all that contradicts pleasure's divine laws, by which all her life she was enchained. You young maidens, too long constrained by a fanciful Virtue's absurd and dangerous bonds and by those of a disgusting religion, imitate the fiery Eugénie; be as quick as she to destroy, to spurn all those ridiculous precepts inculcated in you by imbecile parents. And you, amiable debauchees, you who since youth have known no limits but those of your desires and who have been governed by your caprices alone, study the cynical Dolmancé, proceed like him and go as far as he if you too would travel the length of those flowered ways your lechery prepares for you; in Dolmancé's academy be at last convinced it is only by exploring and enlarging the sphere of his tastes and whims, it is only by sacrificing everything to the senses' pleasure that this individual, who never asked to be cast into this universe of woe, that this poor creature who goes under the name of Man, may be able to sow a smattering of roses atop the thorny path of life.

Dialogue The First

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — Good day, my friend. And what of Monsieur Dolmancé?

LE CHEVALIER — He'll be here promptly at four; we do not dine until seven—and will have, as you see, ample time to chat.

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — You know, my dear brother, I do begin to have a few misgivings about my curiosity and all the obscene plans scheduled for today. Chevalier, you overindulge me, truly you do. The more sensible I should be, the more excited and libertine this accursed mind of mine becomes—and all that you have given me but serves to spoil me… At twenty-six, I should be sober and staid, and I'm still nothing but the most licentious of women... Oh, I've a busy brain, my friend; you'd scarce believe the ideas I have, the things I'd like to do. I supposed that by confining myself to women I would become better behaved...; that were my desires concentrated upon my own sex I would no longer pant after yours: pure fantasy, my friend; my imagination has only been pricked the more by the pleasures I thought to deprive myself of. I have discovered that when it is a question of someone like me, born for libertinage, it is useless to think of imposing limits or restraints upon oneself—impetuous desires immediately sweep them away. In a word, my dear, I am an amphibious creature: I love everything, everyone, whatever it is, it amuses me; I should like to combine every species—but you must admit, Chevalier, is it not the height of extravagance for me to wish to know this unusual Dolmancé who in all his life, you tell me, has been unable to see a woman according to the prescriptions of common usage, this Dolmancé who, a sodomite out of principle, not only worships his own sex but never yields to ours save when we consent to put at his disposal those so well beloved charms of which he habitually makes use when consorting with men?

Tell me, Chevalier, if my fancy is not bizarre! I want to be Ganymede to this new Jupiter, I want to enjoy his tastes, his debauches, I want to be the victim of his errors. Until now, and well you know it, my friend, until now I have given myself thus only to you, through complaisance, or to a few of my servants who, paid to use me in this manner, adopted it for profit only. But today it is no longer the desire to oblige nor is it caprice that moves me, but solely my own penchants. I believe that, between my past experiences with this curious mania and the courtesies to which I am going to be subjected, there is an inconceivable difference, and I wish to be acquainted with it. Paint your Dolmancé for me, please do, that I may have him well fixed in my mind before I see him arrive; for you know my acquaintance with him is limited to an encounter the other day in a house where we were together for but a few minutes.

LE CHEVALIER — Dolmancé, my dear sister, has just turned thirty-six; he is tall, extremely handsome, eyes very alive and very intelligent, but all the same there is some suspicion of hardness, and a trace of wickedness in his features; he has the whitest teeth in the world, a shade of softness about his figure and in his attitude, doubtless owing to his habit of taking on effeminate airs so often; he is extremely elegant, has a pretty voice, many talents, and above all else an exceedingly philosophic bent to his mind.

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — But I trust he does not believe in God!

LE CHEVALIER — Oh, perish the thought! He is the most notorious atheist, the most immoral fellow… Oh, no; his is the most complete and thoroughgoing corruption, and he the most evil individual, the greatest scoundrel in the world.

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — Ah, how that warms me! Methinks that I'll be wild about this man. And what of his fancies, brother?

LE CHEVALIER — You know them full well; Sodom's delights are as dear to him in their active as in their passive form. For his pleasures, he cares for none but men; if however he sometimes deigns to employ women, it is only upon condition they be obliging enough to exchange sex with him. I've spoken of you to him; I advised him of your intentions, he agrees, and in his turn reminds you of the rules of the game. I warn you, my dear, he will refuse you altogether if you attempt to engage him to undertake anything else. "What I consent to do with your sister is," he declares, "an extravagance, an indiscretion with which one soils oneself but rarely and only by taking ample precautions."

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — Soil oneself!… Precautions... Oh, how I adore the language those agreeable persons use! Between ourselves, we women also have exclusive words which like these just spoken, give an idea of the profound horror they have of all those who show heretical tendencies… Tell me, my dear, has he had you? With your adorable face and your twenty years, one may, I dare say, captivate such a man?

LE CHEVALIER — We’ve committed follies together—I'll not hide them from you; you have too much wit to condemn them. The fact is, I favor women; I only give myself up to these odd whimsies when an attractive man urges me to them. And then there's nothing I stop at. I've none of that ludicrous arrogance which makes our young upstarts believe that it's by cuts with your walking stick you respond to such propositions. Is man master of his penchants? One must feel sorry for those who have strange tastes, but never insult them. Their wrong is Nature's too; they are no more responsible for having come into the world with tendencies unlike ours than are we for being born bandy-legged or well-proportioned. Is it, however, that a man acts insultingly to you when he manifests his desire to enjoy you? No, surely not; it is a compliment you are paid; why then answer with injuries and insults? Only fools can think thus; never will you hear an intelligent man discuss the question in a manner different from mine; but the trouble is, the world is peopled with poor idiots who believe it is to lack respect for them to avow one finds them fitted for one's pleasures, and who, pampered by women—themselves forever jealous of what has the look of infringing upon their rights—fancy themselves to be the Don Quixotes of those ordinary rights, and brutalize whoever does not acknowledge the entirety of their extent.

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — Come, my friend, kiss me. Were you to think otherwise, you'd not be my brother. A few details, I beseech you, both with what regards this man's appearance and his pleasures with you.

LE CHEVALIER — One of his friends informed Monsieur Dolmancé of the superb member wherewith you know me provided, and he obtained the consent of the Marquis de V*** to bring us together at supper. Once there, I was obliged to display my equipment: at first curiosity appeared to be his single motive; however, a very fair ass turned my way, and with which I was invited to amuse myself, soon made me see that penchant alone was the cause of this examination. I had Dolmancé notice all the enterprise's difficulties; he was steadfast. "A ram holds no terrors for me," he said, "and you'll not have even the glory of being the most formidable amongst the men who have perforated the anus I offer you." The Marquis was on hand; he encouraged us by fingering, dandling, kissing whatever the one or the other of us brought to light. I took up my position…

“Surely some kind of priming?" I urged. "Nothing of the sort," said the Marquis, "you'll rob Dolmancé of half the sensations he awaits from you; he wants you to cleave him in two, he wants to be torn asunder." "Well," I said, blindly plunging into the gulf, "he'll be satisfied." Perhaps, my dear sister, you think that I met with a great deal of trouble… not at all; my prick, enormous as it is, disappeared, contrary to all my expectations, and I touched the bottom of his entrails without the bugger seeming to feel a thing. I dealt kindly with Dolmancé; the extreme ecstasy he tasted, his wrigglings and quiverings, his enticing utterances, all this soon made me happy too, and I inundated him. Scarcely was I withdrawn when Dolmancé, turning toward me, his hair in disarray and his face red as a bacchante: "You see the state you've put me in, my dear Chevalier," said he, simultaneously presenting a pert, tough rogue of a prick, very long and at least six inches around, "deign, O my love, deign to serve me as a woman after having been my lover, and enable me to say that in your divine arms I have tasted all the delights of the fancy I cherish supremely." Finding as little difficulty in the one as in the other, I readied myself; the Marquis, dropping his breeches before my eyes, begged me to have the kindness to be yet a little of the man with him while I played wife to his friend; and I dealt with him as I had with Dolmancé, who paid me back a hundredfold for all the blows wherewith I belabored our third; and soon, into the depths of my ass, he exhaled that enchanted liquor with which, at virtually the same instant, I sprayed the bowels of V***.

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — You must have known the most extreme pleasure, to find yourself thus between two; they say it is charming.

LE CHEVALIER — My angel, it is surely the best place to be; but whatever may be said of them, they're all extravagances which I should never prefer to the pleasure of women.

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — Well, my chivalrous friend, as reward for your touching consideration, today I am going to hand over to your passions a young virgin, a girl, more beautiful than Love itself.

LE CHEVALIER — What! With Dolmancé... you're bringing a woman here?

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — It is a matter of an education; that of a little thing I knew last autumn at the convent, while my husband was at the baths. We could accomplish nothing there, we dared try nothing, too many eyes were fixed upon us, but we made a promise to meet again, to get together as soon as possible. Occupied with nothing but this desire, I have, in order to satisfy it, become acquainted with her family. Her father is a libertine—I've enthralled him. At any rate, the lovely one is coming, I am waiting for her; we'll spend two days together… two delicious days; I shall employ the better part of the time educating the young lady. Dolmancé and I will put into this pretty little head every principle of the most unbridled libertinage, we will set her ablaze with our own fire, we will feed her upon our philosophy, inspire her with our desires, and as I wish to join a little practice to theory, as I like the demonstrations to keep abreast of the dissertations, I have destined to you, dear brother, the harvest of Cythera's myrtle, and to Dolmancé shall go the roses of Sodom. I'll have two pleasures at once: that of enjoying these criminal lecheries myself, and that of giving the lessons, of inspiring fancies in the sweet innocent I am luring into our nets. Very well, Chevalier, answer me: is the project worthy of my imagination?

LE CHEVALIER — It could not have risen in another: it is divine, my sister, and I promise to enact to perfection the charming role you reserve for me. Ah, mischievous one, how much pleasure you are going to take in educating this child; what pleasure you will find in corrupting her, in stifling within this young heart every seed of virtue and of religion planted there by her tutors! Actually, all this is too roué for me.

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — Be certain I'll spare nothing to pervert her, degrade her, demolish in her all the false ethical notions with which they may already have been able to dizzy her; in two lessons, I want to render her as criminal as am!… as impious… as debauched, as depraved. Notify Dolmancé, explain everything to him immediately he gets here so that his immoralities' poison, circulating in this young spirit together with the venom I shall inject, will in the shortest possible time wither and still all the seeds of virtue that, but for us, might germinate there.

LE CHEVALIER — It would be impossible to find a better man: irreligion, impiety, inhumanity, libertinage spill from Dolmancé’s lips as in times past mystic unction fell from those of the celebrated Archbishop of Cambrai. He is the most profound seducer, the most corrupt, the most dangerous man… Ah, my dear, let your pupil but comply with this teacher's instructions, and I guarantee her straightway damned.

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — It should certainly not take long, considering the dispositions I know her to possess…

LE CHEVALIER — But tell me, my dear sister, is there nothing to fear from the parents? May not this little one chatter when she returns home?

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — Have no fears. I have seduced the father… he's mine. I must confess to you, I surrendered myself to him in order to close his eyes: he knows nothing of my designs, and will never dare to scan them… I have him. LE CHEVALIER — Your methods are appalling!

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — Such they must be, else they're not sure.

LE CHEVALIER — And tell me, please, who is this youngster?

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — Her name is Eugénie, daughter of a certain Mistival, one of the wealthiest commercial figures in the capital, aged about thirty-six; her mother is thirty-two at the very most, and the little girl fifteen. Mistival is as libertine as his wife is pious. As for Eugénie, dear one, I should in vain undertake to figure her to you; she is quite beyond my descriptive powers… satisfy yourself with the knowledge that assuredly neither you nor I have ever set eyes on anything so delicious, anywhere.

LE CHEVALIER — But at least sketch a little if you cannot paint the portrait, so that, knowing fairly well with whom I am to deal, I may better fill my imagination with the idol to which I must sacrifice.

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — Very well, my friend: her abundant chestnut hair—there's too much of it to grasp in one's hand—descends to below her buttocks; her skin is of a dazzling whiteness, her nose rather aquiline, her eyes jet black and of a warmth!… Ah, my friend, 'tis impossible to resist those eyes… You've no idea of the stupidities they've driven me to… Could you but see the pretty eyebrows that crown them… the extraordinary lashes that border them… A very small mouth, superb teeth, and, all of it, of a freshness!… One of her beauties is the elegant manner whereby her lovely head is attached to her shoulders, the air of nobility she has when she turns… Eugénie is tall for her age: one might think her seventeen; her figure is a model of elegance and finesse, her throat, her bosom delicious… There indeed are the two prettiest little breasts!… Scarcely enough there to fill the hand, but so soft… so fresh… so very white! Twenty times have I gone out of my head while kissing them; and had you been able to see how she came alive under my caresses… how her two great eyes represented to me the whole state of her mind… My friend, I ignore the rest. Ah I but if I must judge of her by what I know, never, I say, had Olympus a divinity comparable with this… But I hear her… leave us; go out by way of the garden to avoid meeting her, and be on time at the rendezvous.

LE CHEVALIER — The portrait you have just made for me assures my promptness… Ah, heaven I to go out… to leave you, in the state I am in… Adieu!… a kiss… a kiss, my dear sister, to satisfy me at least till then. (She kisses him, touches the prick straining in his breeches, and the young man leaves in haste.)

Dialogue The Second

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE —Welcome, my pet I have been awaiting you with an impatience you fully appreciate if you can read the feelings I have in my heart.

EUGENIE — Oh, my precious one, I thought I should never arrive, so eager was I to find myself in your arms. An hour before leaving, I dreaded all might be changed; my mother was absolutely opposed to this delightful party, declaring it ill became a girl of my age to go abroad alone; but my father had so abused her the day before yesterday that a single one of his glances was quite enough to cause Madame Mistival to subside utterly, and it ended with her consenting to what my father had granted me, and I rushed here.

I have two days; your carriage and one of your servants must without fail take me home the day after tomorrow.

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — How short is this period, my dearest angel, in so little time I shall hardly be able to express to you all you excite in me… and indeed we have to talk. You know, do you not, that 'tis during this interview that I am to initiate you into the most secret of Venus' mysteries; shall two days be time enough?

EUGENIE — Ah, were I not to arrive at a complete knowledge, I should remain… I came hither to be instructed, and will not go till I am informed…

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE, kissing her — Dear love, how many things are we going to do and say to one another! But, by the way, do you wish to take lunch, my queen? For the lesson may be prolonged.

EUGENIE — I have no need, dear friend, than to listen to you; we lunched a league from here; I'll be able to wait until eight o'clock this evening without feeling the least hunger.

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — Then let's go into my boudoir, where we will be more at our ease. I have already spoken to the servants. You may be certain no one shall take it into his head to interrupt us. (They enter the boudoir, linked arm in arm.)

Dialogue The Third

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE EUGENIE DOLMANCE EUGENIE, greatly surprised to find in this room a man whom she had not expected — Great God! Dearest friend, we are betrayed!

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE, equally surprised — Strange, Monsieur, to find you here. Were you not expected at four?

DOLMANCE — One always hastens the advent of that happiness which comes of seeing you, Madame. I encountered Monsieur, your brother—he anticipated the usefulness of my presence at the lessons you are to give Mademoiselle, and knew this to be the lyceum where they would be given. Unperceived, he introduced me into this chamber, far from imagining you might disapprove; and as for himself, aware his demonstrations will only be necessary after the dissertations on theory, he will not make his appearance until later.

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — Indeed, Dolmancé, this is an unforeseen turn…

EUGENIE — By which I am not deceived, my good friend; it is all your work… At least, you should have consulted me... instead of exposing me to this shame. It will certainly prejudice all our projects.

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — Eugénie, I protest—my brother is responsible for this, not I. But there's no cause for alarm: I know Dolmancé for a most agreeable man, and he possesses just that degree of philosophic understanding we require for your enlightenment. He can be of nothing but the greatest service to our schemes. As for his discretion, I am as willing to answer for it as for my own. Therefore, dear heart, familiarize yourself with this man who in all the world is the best endowed to form you and to guide you into a career of the happiness and the pleasures we wish to taste together.

EUGENIE, blushing — Oh I still find all this most upsetting…

DOLMANCE — Come, my lovely Eugénie, put yourself at ease... Modesty is an antiquated virtue which you, so rich in charms, ought to know wonderfully well how to do without.

EUGENIE — But decency…

DOLMANCE — Ha! A Gothicism not very much defended these days. It is so hostile to Nature! (Dolmancé seizes Eugénie, folds her in his arms, and kisses her.)

EUGENIE, struggling in his embrace — That's quite enough, Monsieur… Indeed, you show me very little consideration!

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — Eugénie, listen to me: let's both of us cease behaving like prudes with this charming gentleman; I am not better acquainted with him than are you, yet watch how I give myself to him. (She kisses him indecently on the mouth.) Imitate me.

EUGENIE — Oh, Most willingly; where might I find better examples? (She puts herself in Dolmancé’s arms; he kisses her ardently, tongue in mouth.)

DOLMANCE — Amiable, delicious creature!

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE, kissing her in the same way — Didst think, little chit, I'd not have my turn as well? (At this point Dolmancé, holding first one in his arms, then the other, tongues both, each for a quarter of an hour, and they both tongue one another and him.)

DOLMANCE — Ah, such preliminaries make me drunk with desire! Mesdames, upon my word, it is extraordinarily warm here; more lightly attired, we might converse with infinitely greater comfort.

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — You are right, sit; we'll don these gauze negligees of our charms, they'll conceal only those that must be hidden from desire.

EUGENIE — Indeed, dear one, you lead me to do things!

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE, helping her undress — Completely ridiculous, isn't it?

EUGENIE — Most improper at the very least, I'd say… My how you kiss me!

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — Pretty bosom!… a rose only now reaching full bloom.

DOLMANCE, considering, without touching, Eugénie's breasts — And which promises yet other allurements… infinitely to be preferred.

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — Infinitely to be preferred?

DOLMANCE — Oh yes, upon my honor. (Saying which, Dolmancé appears eager to turn Eugénie about in order to inspect her from the rear.)

EUGENIE — No, I beg of you!

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — No, Dolmancé… I don't want you yet to see... an object whose sway over you is so great that, the image of it once fixed in your head, you are unable thereafter to reason coolly. We need your lessons, first give them to us—and afterward the myrtle you covet will be your reward.

DOLMANCE — Very well, but in order to demonstrate, in order to give this beautiful child the first lessons of libertinage, we will require willing cooperation from you, Madame, in the exercise that must follow.

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — So be it! All right then, look you here—I'm entirely naked. Make your dissertations upon me as much as you please.

DOLMANCE — Oh, lovely body! Tis Venus herself, embellished by the Graces.

EUGENIE — Oh, my dear friend, what charms! Delights! Let me drink them in with my eyes, let me cover them with my kisses. (She does so.)

DOLMANCE — What excellent predispositions! A trifle less passion, lovely Eugénie, for the moment you are only being asked to show a little attention.

EUGENIE — Let's continue, I'm listening… But how beautiful she is... so plump, so fresh!… Ah, how charming my dear friend is. Is she not, Monsieur?

DOLMANCE — Beautiful, assuredly... she is wondrous to see; but I am persuaded you yield to her in nothing… Well, now, my pretty little student, either you pay attention to me or beware lest, if you are not docile, I exercise over you the rights amply conferred upon me by my title as your mentor.

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — Oh, yes, yes indeed, Dolmancé, I put her into your safekeeping. She must have a severe scolding if she misbehaves.

DOLMANCE — It is very possible I might not be able to confine myself to remonstrances.

EUGENIE — Great heaven! You terrify me... what then would you do to me, Monsieur?

DOLMANCE, stammering, and kissing Eugénie on the mouth — Punishments... corrections... I might very well hold this pretty little ass accountable for mistakes made by the head. (He strikes the former through the gauze dressing gown in which Eugénie is presently arrayed.)

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — Yes, I approve of the project but not of the gesture. Let's begin our lesson, else the little time granted us to enjoy Eugénie will be spent in preliminaries, and the instruction shall remain incomplete.

DOLMANCE, who, as he discusses them, one by one touches the parts of Madame de Saint-Ange's body — I begin. I will say nothing of these fleshy globes; you know as well as I, Eugénie, that they are indifferently known as bosoms, breasts, tits. Pleasure may put them to profitable use: while amusing himself, a lover has them continually before his eyes: he caresses them, handles them, indeed, some lovers form of them the very seat of their pleasure and niche their member between these twin mounts of Venus which the woman then squeezes together, compressing this member; after a little management, certain men succeed in spreading thereupon the delicious balm of life whose outpouring causes the whole happiness of libertines… But this member of which we shall be obliged to speak incessantly—should we not be well advised, Madame, to give our student a lecture upon it?

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — Verily, I do think so.

DOLMANCE — Very well, Madame, I am going to recline upon this couch; place yourself near me. Then you will lay hands upon the subject and you will yourself explain its properties to our young student. (Dolmancé lies down and Madame de Saint-Ange demonstrates.)

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — This scepter of Venus you have before your eyes, Eugénie, is the primary agent of love's pleasure: it is called the member: there is not a single part of the human body into which it cannot introduce itself. Always obedient to the passions of the person who wields it, sometimes it nests there (She touches Eugénie's cunt.), this is the ordinary route, the one in widest use, but not the most agreeable; in pursuit of a more mysterious sanctuary, it is often here (She spreads wide Eugénie's buttocks and indicates the anus.) that the libertine seeks enjoyment: we will return to this most delicious pleasure of them all; there are as well the mouth, the breasts, the armpits which provide him with further altars upon which to burn his incense. And finally whatever be the place among all these he most prefers, after a few instants of agitation the member may be seen to vent a white and viscous liquor, whose flowing forth plunges the man into a delirium intense enough to procure for him the sweetest pleasures he can hope to have in life.

EUGENIE — How much I should like to see this liquor flow.

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — I need but vibrate my hand—you see how the thing becomes irritated the more I chafe and pull on it. These movements are known as pollution, and in the language of libertinage this action is called frigging.

EUGENIE — Oh, please, dear friend, allow me to frig this splendid member!

DOLMANCE — Look out! I'll not be able… don't interfere with her, Madame, this ingenuousness has got me horribly erected.

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — No good will come of this excitement. Be reasonable, Dolmancé: once that semen flows, the activity of your animal spirits will be diminished and the warmth of your dissertations will be lessened correspondingly.

EUGENIE, fondling Dolmancé’s testicles — Ah, my dear friend, how sorry I am you resist my desires!… And these balls, what might be their purpose? What are they called?

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — The technical term is genitals, male genitals... testicles belongs to art, the balls are the reservoir containing the abundant semen I have just mentioned and which, expelled into the woman's matrix, or womb, produces the human species; but we will not stress these details, Eugénie, for they relate more to medicine than to libertinage. A pretty girl ought simply to concern herself with fucking, and never with engendering. No need to touch at greater length on what pertains to the dull business of population, from now on we shall address ourselves principally, nay, uniquely to those libertine lecheries whose spirit is in no wise reproductive.

EUGENIE — But, dear friend, when this enormous member I can scarcely grip in my hand, when this member penetrates, as you assure me it can, into a hole as little as the one in your behind, that must cause the woman a great deal of pain.

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — Whether this introduction be wrought before or behind, if she is not yet accustomed to it a woman always suffers. It has pleased Nature so to make us that we attain happiness only by way of pain. But once vanquished and had this way, nothing can equal the joy one tastes upon the entrance of this member into our ass; it is a pleasure incontestably superior to any sensation procured by this same introduction in front. And, besides, how many dangers does not a woman thus avoid! Fewer risks to her health, and none at all of pregnancy. For the present I'll say no more about this delight—your master and mine, Eugénie, will soon award it a full analysis, and by uniting practice with theory will, I trust, convince you, my precious one, that amongst all the bedroom's pleasures, that is the only one for which you should have a preference.

DOLMANCE — I beg you to speed your demonstrations, Madame, for I can no longer restrain myself; I'll discharge despite my efforts, and this redoubtable member, reduced to nothing, will be unable to aid your lessons.

EUGENIE — What! It would be reduced to nothing, dear heart, if it were to lose this semen you speak of!… Oh, do allow me to help him lose it, so that I may see what happens to it… And besides, I should take such pleasure in seeing it flow

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — No, no, Dolmancé, up with you. Remember that this is the payment of your labors, and that I'll not turn her over to you until you've merited her.

DOLMANCE — So be it; but the better to convince Eugénie of all we are going to relate concerning pleasure, would it be in any way prejudicial to Eugénie's instruction if, for instance, you were to frig her in front of me?

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — Why, doubtless not, and I shall do so all the more happily since I am certain this lubricious episode will only enrich our lessons. Onto the couch, my sweet.

EUGENIE — Oh dear God! the delicious nichel But why all these mirrors?

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — By repeating our attitudes and postures in a thousand different ways, they infinitely multiply those same pleasures for the persons seated here upon this ottoman. Thus everything is visible, no part of the body can remain hidden: everything must be seen; these images are so many groups disposed around those enchained by love, so many delicious tableaux wherewith lewdness waxes drunk and which soon drive it to its climax.

EUGENIE — What a marvelous invention!

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — Dolmancé, undress the victim yourself.

DOLMANCE — That will not be difficult, since 'tis merely a question of removing this gauze in order to discern naked the most appealing features. (He strips her, and his first glances are instantly directed upon her behind.) And so I am about to see this divine, this priceless ass of which I have such ardent expectations!… Ah, by God! What fullness of flesh and what coolness, what stunning elegance!… Never have I seen one lovelier!

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — Rascal! How clearly your initial homages betray your tastes and pleasures!

DOLMANCE — But can there be anything in the world to equal this?… Where might love find a more divine altar?… Eugénie… sublime Eugenie, let me overwhelm this ass of yours with the softest caresses. (He fingers and kisses it, transported.)

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — Stop, libertine!… You forget Eugénie belongs to me only. She's to be your reward for the lessons she awaits from you; but you'll not have your recompense before she has been given those lessons. Enough of this ardor or you'll anger me.

DOLMANCE — Scoundrel! It's your jealousy… Very well. Pass me yours and I'll pay it a similar homage. (He raises Madame de Saint-Ange's negligee and caresses her behind.) Ah, 'tis lovely, my angel, 'tis delicious too! Let me compare them both… I'd see them one next to the other-Ganymede beside Venus! (He lavishes kisses upon each.) In order to have the bewitching spectacle of so much beauty constantly before my eyes, Madame, could you not, by interlacing yourselves, uninterruptedly offer my gaze these charming asses I worship?

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — Perfectly well! There… are you satisfied?… (They intertwine their bodies in such a manner that both asses confront Dolmancé.)

DOLMANCE — It could not be better: 'tis precisely what I asked for. And now agitate those superb asses with all the fire of lubricity; let them sink and rise in cadence; let them obey the proddings whereby pleasure is going to stir them… Oh, splendid, splendid, 'tis delicious!…

EUGENIE — Ah, my dearest one, what pleasures you give me… What is it you call what you are doing now?

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — Frigging, my pet, giving oneself pleasure. Stop a moment; we'll alter our positions. Examine my cunt… thus is named the temple of Venus. Look sharply at that coign your hand covers, examine it well. I am going to open it a little. This elevation you notice above it is called the mound, which is garnished with hair, generally, when one reaches the age of fourteen or fifteen, when, that is, a girl begins to have periods. Here above is a little tongue-shaped thing—that is the clitoris, and there lies all a woman's power of sensation. It is the center of all mine; it would be impossible to tickle this part of me without seeing me swoon with delight… Try it… Ah, sweet little bitch, how well you do it! One would think you've done nothing else all your life!… enough!… stop!…No, I tell you, no, I do not wish to surrender myself … Oh, Dolmancé, stop me!… under the enchanted fingers of this pretty child, I am about to go out of my mind.

DOLMANCE — You might be able to lower the temperature of your ideas by varying them: frig her in your turn; keep a grip on yourself, and let her go to work… There, yes, in this position, in this manner her pretty little ass is between my hands, I'll pollute it ever so lightly with a finger… Let yourself go Eugénie, abandon all your senses to pleasure, let it be the one object, the one god of your existence; it is to this god a girl ought to sacrifice everything, and in her eyes, nothing must be as holy as pleasure.

EUGENIE — Nothing in the world is so delightful, I do feel that… I am beside myself… I no longer know what I am saying, nor what I am doing… What a drunkenness steals through all my being!

DOLMANCE — Look at the little rascal discharge! And squeeze!… Her anus nearly nipped off the end of my finger… how splendid it would be to bugger her at such a moment! (He stands and claps his prick to the girl's ass.)

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — Yet another moment's patience. The dear girl's education must be our sole occupation!… How pleasant it is to enlighten her!

DOLMANCE — Well then, Eugénie, you observe that after a more or less prolonged pollution, the seminal glands swell, enlarge, and finally exhale a liquid whose release hurls the woman into the most intense rapture. This is known as discharging. When it pleases your good friend here, I'll show you, but in a more energetic and more imperious manner, how the same operation occurs in a man.

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — Wait, Eugénie, now I'm going to teach you a new way to drown a woman in joy. Spread your thighs… Dolmancé, you see how I am adjusting her, her ass is all yours. Suck it for her while my tongue licks her cunt, and between the two of us let's see if we can get her to swoon three or four times. Your little mound is charming, Eugénie, how I adore kissing this downy flesh!… I see your clitoris more clearly now; 'tis but somewhat formed, yet most sensitive… How you do quiver and squirm!… Let me spread you… Ah! you're a virgin indeed!… Describe what you feel when our two tongues run at once into your two apertures. (They do as they have said.)

EUGENIE — Ah, my dear, it thrills me so; it is a sensation impossible to depict! I'd be hard put to say which of your tongues plunges me further into my delirium.

DOLMANCE — In this posture, Madame, my prick is well within your reach. Condescend to frig it, I beg of you, while I suck this heavenly ass. Thrust your tongue yet further, Madame; don't be content to suck her clitoris; make your voluptuous tongue penetrate into her womb: 'tis the surest way to hasten the ejaculation.

EUGENIE, stiffening — I cannot bear it any more! oh, I'm dying! Don't abandon me, dear friends, I am about to swoon. (She discharges between her two initiators.)

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — Well, My pet! What think you of the pleasure we have given you?

EUGENIE — I am dead, exhausted… but I beg you to explain two words you pronounced and which I do not understand. First of all, what does womb signify?

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — 'Tis a kind of vessel much resembling a bottle whose neck embraces the male's member, and which receives the fuck produced in the woman by glandular seepage and in the man by the ejaculation we will exhibit for you; and of the commingling of these liquors is born the germ whereof result now boys, now girls.

EUGENIE — Oh, I see; this definition simultaneously explains the word fuck whose meaning I did not thoroughly grasp until now. And is the union of the seeds necessary to the formation of the fetus?

MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE — Assuredly; although it is proven that the fetus owes its existence only to the man's sperm, this latter, by itself, unmixed with the woman's, would come to naught. But that which we women furnish has a merely elaborative function; it does not create, it furthers creation without being its cause. Indeed, there are several contemporary naturalists who claim it is useless; whence the moralists, always guided by science's discoveries, have decided—and the conclusion has a degree of plausibility—that, such being the case, the child born of the father's blood owes filial tenderness to him alone, an assertion not without its appealing qualities and one which, even though a woman, I should not be inclined to contest.